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The Longest Ride = The Longest Movie

The Longest Ride movie introduces us to the scary world of bull riding and relationships.  And Scott Eastwood quickly learns maybe it’s just safer to ride the bull.  I mean, there are several times in the movie where you swear he is saying, “She makes my brain hurt.”

But when the movie is not focused on couple issues, it seems like Eastwood spends most of the time trying to prove he’s a country boy.  He’s like, “I’m small town because I own a cowboy hat.  And if that doesn’t convince you then I will do my best blue steel as the Marlboro man.”

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To balance all this drama they introduce Alan Alda.  He’s had a full life, full relationship and basically tries to annoy us with every little detail.  Yeah thanks for the relationship advice Hawkeye from Mash.

You get half way into this movie and you’re like, “They could have done this in five minutes.”  But that’s when Britt Robertson tells Alda her relationship with Eastwood is not going well, so she says to Alda, “Tell me about your relationship.”  And Alda says, “Ok, prepare to be depressed.”  Great there’s another hour.

In the end there is a nice pay off.  Eastwood becomes the top bull rider, then he inherits Alda’s collection of expensive art and he gets the girl.  Something none all of us can relate to in the real world.

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