Trainwreck is a movie about how not to become the creepy old person in the club. You know the one who makes you do a double take and say, “I need to find someone tonight. I’ll take anything, even that youngish looking troll in the corner.”
But that’s the beauty of a train wreck. They never seem to say, “Hey I’m about a decade past my prime.”
Now in this movie the train wreck is Amy Schumer. Whenever anyone gets close she’s like, “Sorry, I’m already committed to my plant. Yeah, I’ve got a lot of watering to do.”
But her attitude changes when she hooks up with sports doctor to the stars Bill Hader. He completely throws her off her game just because he’s not a giant prick. This confuses Amy so she goes to her sister and says, “You’re married how did you decide to become dead inside?”
Eventually, Amy and Bill do become a couple. But the whole time Amy is with Bill, she looks for ways to give the relationship the old torpedo. This finally happens when Amy argues with Bill all night and makes him to tired to do an important surgery. This is her low point. She loses her man and her job just like a bad Taylor Swift song.
But in the end, Amy wins Bill back by dancing with the Knicks cheerleaders and attempting a basketball dunk with a trampoline. The dancing is great. But the basketball shot is a painful lesson in gravity.
The Straight Dope: Amy is the real deal. She knows how to turn “that girl” in the club into somebody we all look at and go, “And how did she get married? I guess he doesn’t know her past!”