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Self/less Is The Poor Mans Version Of Every Brain Switch Movie Ever Made

Self/less asks the question, if you could become immortal and choose your own body would you really choose to be Ryan Reynolds?  Let’s be real.  That body made Green Lantern.  But apparently that’s good enough for Sir Ben Kingsley.  He’s like, “All I’m really shooting for is hair.”

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So Kingsley makes the switch and immediately takes his new body out to get nice and dirty.  Instantly I thought, hey Kingsley, you do know that body’s not a rental.  You can’t just break it and then complain on yelp.

From the get go, the new Kingsley/Reynolds gets flashes of the old Ryan Reynold’s memories.  And Kingsley/Reynolds is like, “This brain sucks.”

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So the owner of Phoenix Corp tells him as long as you take these pills, you’ll be in control.  But of coarse Kingsley/Reynolds doesn’t listen and he follows those memory flashes to Ryan Reynolds wife and daughter.  And this is when Phoenix corp goes, “Let’s kill them all dead.”

But at this point, Kingsley/Reynolds learns he has special forces training. He’s like, “Sweet, I get to kick ass like Jason Bourne and get an oscar like Kingsley.”

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For the rest of the movie Kingsley/Reynolds and Phoenix corp play a game of cat and mouse.  That is, until Kingsley/Reynolds takes out the owner of Phoenix corp with a flame thrower.  Way to be sensitive.

The Straight Dope:  The concept of this movie is great.  But after watching Ryan Reynold’s take the red pill a few times, you really regret seeing how deep this rabbit hole goes.

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