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Dope Is a Typical Coming of Age Story If You Happen To Be A Geek Who Lives in the Hood And Has to Sell Drugs To Get Into Harvard

Dope is a movie about a group of teens who don’t fit in.  That sounds like any random Tuesday in high school.  But I guess these teens really don’t fit in because they like 90’s rap, BMX bikes, and anything else incredibly nerdy.  Man with a skill set like that they’re practically begging for a swirly, or at least an atomic wedgie.


Things get interesting when the lead character Malcom goes to a party to meet his crush Zoey Kravitz.  But his game gets ruined when there’s a shoot out.  At that moment Malcom is like, “I don’t care how hot she is, I just want to live.  Maybe I’ll wait a little longer for that autograph from her dad.

Fortunately Malcom and Zoey make it out alive but the next day Malcom realizes Dom the drug dealer put a serious amount of molly in his bag.  At this point Malcom is like, “Now I just don’t want to go to jail.”  And that’s when Malcom and his friends get together and decide to really freak out.


This only gets worse when Malcom learns the guy responsible for the drugs happens to be his advisor who controls his admission to Harvard.  And instantly I thought, yeah that’s as likely as seeing a unicorn in Compton.


But, in short order Malcom learns they have to sell the drugs.  This is a problem because Malcom and his friends couldn’t even sell a claritin.  So they get their white friend to tap into the dark web and move the molly using bitcoin.  The real genius part of this plan is they set up a shop using his Harvard advisors bank account.  Man that’s just cold.

The Straight Dope:  Malcom and the gang get put in a situation where most of us would fold.  This is a must see movie.  It has drugs, parties and nineties rap – minus the Vanilla Ice.

More funny at JoeJCom.
Comedy video of this post at JoeJCom-YouTube

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